your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
