Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
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