Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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