That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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