Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
