I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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