Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
