So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
