I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
