I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
