smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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