i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Randomize
