Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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