Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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