are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
