This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Floor bacon is actually really good
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
