that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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