So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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