I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
