If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
