Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
He felt like a one man threesome
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
