he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Drake has all the answers
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
