I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
We just shotgunned beers for America
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize