Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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