if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
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