he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
