Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I'm getting married
To pizza
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
