i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
