its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
