The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Randomize
