When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
She's the barista slut.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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