So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
