you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy�
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize
