Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
