Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
