I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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