So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
