The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Randomize
