we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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