Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
