what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
