Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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