Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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