Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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