you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
