At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
