Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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