I'm sorry my penis didn't work
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
