Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
