Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize
